People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates.
-Thomas Szasz
-Thomas Szasz
I am finding myself drawn to this quote (thanks Tall Mom!) as I enter this crossroads in my life. I never thought I would be the type of person to desire to stay home with my kids. But boy do I ever! But I am also finding myself drawn to work to stay sharp mentally and emotionally. I guess this is the struggle that all mom's face and am hoping I can figure out a way to make it work for our little family!
I have always thought of myself as knowing what I want in life and who I am. But as I approach the big 3-0, I find that I really don't know much about anything about myself. This post is really about helping me find me.
Words/ phrases that describe me:
- wife
- mother
- sister
- daughter
- athlete
- compassionate
- always wanting to help
- always wanting to achieve
- never wanting to feel stupid or unable to accomplish something
- do not take failure well
- sometimes/ alot of times struggling to figure out where to go next in life
According to my quote up there, I should not be defined by these things, but look at what I want to be and just create it.
What do I want to be?
- everything to everyone! ;-) this must be the problem!
- a great chef!
- a fast runner!
- an excellent mama who is around to help my kids become everything they can be
- wise beyond my years
- unique
- confident
- slightly quirky
- a great photographer
- a great crafter
I want to find something outside of home that I can channel some energy into. I have this strong desire to help others but have yet to find a way to release that.
As I write this, I think I have decided (ha!) to run NYC for a charity no matter if I get in the lottery or not. Maybe this will help me feel better about my impact on the world. I know that I impact newbie and baby girl. But I want to do more and maybe this will be the start of that for me.
Do you ever feel like you are dangling on the edge of a cliff that if you take the risk and fall great things will be waiting for you?
How do you describe yourself?
What would you like to make of yourself?
On a completely different note:
Yesterday I ran 3 miles at a 7:32 pace! Yes, that is right! 3 miles under 8 minutes! IN A ROW!
Hey! I just saw your comment about hip stretches. I do your typical hamstring stretch (what I was in the process of doing in that picture), then roll to the outside of my foot up on the wall, turn towards my leg that is up, and bend towards the wall. Basically, stretching the outside of my hip. Disclaimer: I made this totally up on my own, based on what 'felt good'. :)
ReplyDeleteI also really REALLY like pulling my toe up to my butt, and stretching out my quads, while pushing my pelvis forward. This helps engage the hip & core and stretches that! In that same vein, I sit on my knees, then bend backwards, so my legs are under my thighs/butt. Feels SOO GOOD!
Best post I've read all week! month maybe. You bring up such great things to think about. I have come to a cross roads or a point of feeling like this many times in my life and it usually leads to wonderful things...big doors end up opening and I find myself continuing on this awesome journey. This is how I felt when I quit my job. I started a children's book, this blog and made many new goals/changes. Something big is just around the corner. Love this about humans...that so many of us have this desire to be the best US that we can be and we keep pushing and seeking ways to soar!
ReplyDeleteGreat run! You're awesome! And thanks for the awesome comment on my blog this morning...made my day! I would describe myself as Passionate, soul seeking, lover of life, mother always, Love a challenge, always seeking the best Me and best for my life and family, spiritual, intuitive (very), and drawn to words and ways to express myself and make meaning out of this lovely life!
I must go and break up some monkey fights!